Am I a "Social Media Empathetic Enabler"... I really don't mean to be...

Based on psychological and social dynamics, here are the types of people who tend to support them, even when the behavior appears harmful:

1. Close Friends and Family: These individuals often feel a sense of loyalty or emotional obligation to offer support, even if they recognize the destructive behavior. They may fear abandoning the person or believe their support can help turn things around. However, their proximity can sometimes blind them to the severity of the situation or lead to enabling behaviors.

2. Empathetic Enablers: Some people, often with high empathy, feel compelled to offer encouragement or validation, even for harmful actions, because they sympathize with the person’s pain or struggles. They may avoid confrontation to prevent causing further distress, inadvertently reinforcing the behavior.

3. Attention Seekers or "Saviors": Certain individuals are drawn to drama or crisis, offering support to feel needed or to gain social capital. They may publicly align with the person to appear compassionate or to boost their own image, even if the support lacks depth or critical judgment.

4. Like-Minded Individuals: People who share similar struggles (e.g., mental health issues, substance abuse) may offer support out of solidarity or because they normalize the behavior. They might see the self-destructive patterns as relatable or justified, creating a feedback loop that perpetuates the cycle.

5. Bystanders with Low Stakes: Casual acquaintances or online connections may offer superficial support (e.g., likes, heart emojis, or vague encouragements like “You got this!”) without fully understanding the situation. They may not feel responsible for deeper intervention or may not perceive the behavior as serious.

When Should People Step In?

Deciding when to intervene is tricky and depends on the context, relationship, and severity of the behavior.

Here are some guidelines for when intervention might be necessary:

1. Clear Harm or Danger: If the person’s posts suggest immediate risk to themselves or others (e.g., explicit talk of self-harm, suicide, or reckless behavior like driving under the influence), immediate action is warranted. This could mean contacting the person directly, informing close contacts, or, in extreme cases, alerting authorities or platform moderators (Facebook has reporting tools for self-harm concerns).

2. Escalating Patterns: If the self-destructive behavior is persistent or worsening (e.g., frequent posts about substance abuse, risky decisions, or emotional breakdowns), it may be time to step in, especially if the person seems isolated or unresponsive to casual support. Look for signs like withdrawal from offline relationships or a shift toward more extreme content.

3. Impact on Others: If the person’s public behavior is harming others (e.g., aggressive posts, public shaming, or dragging others into their spiral), intervention may be needed to protect both the individual and their community.

4. Receptivity to Help: If the person is indirectly asking for help (e.g., vague cries for attention or hints at needing support), this can be an opportunity to reach out privately with genuine concern rather than public reinforcement.

How to Step In

• Private Outreach: Start with a non-judgmental, private message expressing concern (e.g., “Hey, I’ve noticed you seem to be going through a lot. Are you okay? I’m here if you need to talk.”). Public comments can sometimes escalate attention-seeking behavior or shame the person.

• Encourage Professional Help: Gently suggest resources like therapy, hotlines (e.g., 988 in the U.S. for mental health crises), or support groups if the behavior seems beyond what friends can handle.

• Set Boundaries: If you’re close to the person, avoid enabling (e.g., excusing harmful behavior) while still showing care. Encourage accountability without cutting them off.

• Use Platform Tools: If the situation feels urgent and you’re not close enough to intervene directly, use Facebook’s reporting features for posts indicating self-harm or suicidal ideation. The platform may connect the person with resources.

When to Step Back

Not everyone is equipped to intervene, especially if the person is resistant or the situation is complex (e.g., involving addiction or severe mental health issues). If the behavior continues despite attempts to help, or if it’s draining your own mental health, it may be necessary to step back and encourage professional intervention instead.

The decision to step in should balance compassion with realism, supporting someone doesn’t mean endorsing their harmful actions. Timing and approach matter as much as the decision itself. If you’re unsure, consulting a trusted mutual contact or professional can help guide the next steps.

***One last thing. Preserving YOUR relationship with a person so that YOU can "KEEP THEM", is just outright cowardly... more than likely they will one day "return" to the people who have loved them all along, and it's then that they might be reminded WHO enabled them... for their own selfish reasons...